A Better Sex Life

May 10 issue - Watch a few "Sex and the City" reruns or page through a women's magazine and you might think that women are not only interested in sex, but obsessed with it. Yet if you were to ask women about their sex lives, more than a third would voice concern, according to a 1999 analysis of the University of Chicago's National Health and Social Life Survey.

In this comprehensive look at American sexual behavior, one woman in seven reported problems with arousal and one in five reported low sexual desire. These complaints may not all qualify as "dysfunction," but do suggest a lack of passion and intimacy.

Is a new Viagra the answer? Until recently, drugmakers assumed that sildenafil (the active ingredient in Viagra) would give women the same boost it does men. But that hope fizzled when studies showed the drug was no more effective than a placebo.

Whether you're male or female, the basic necessities for sexual activity are the same: working sexual anatomy, normal hormone activity and enough physical and mental health to respond to another person. But when it comes to satisfying sex, men and women are different.

Visual cues tend to propel men toward the tangible goals of erection, intercourse and orgasm. A woman's sex drive can be just as potent, but an emotional connection to her partner plays a larger role in arousal and satisfaction. In a Kinsey Institute survey, women ranked an overall sense of well-being as their top prerequisite for satisfying sex, followed by positive feelings during lovemaking. Online pharmacy here.

The frequency of sex, and the intensity of physical pleasure, fell farther down the list. Depression, stress, past experiences and relationship conflicts can easily thwart sexual pleasure. Side effects of many medications, particularly some antidepressants, can also scuttle sexual desire. For women in their 30s and 40s, juggling the demands of career and family can dampen interest as well. It isn't uncommon for sex to feel like one more thing on an already long to-do list.